Why being fat is good!

Wow, how many people immediately fell for this headline. Really, they think, someone will tell you that being fat is not only bad, but also good ?! And indeed: despite the fact that fatty-bbws do not think about their condition until a certain point, they still understand latently that being fat is bad. Firstly, all sorts of doctors are constantly telling them about this. Secondly, they are often reminded of this by others, especially friends and relatives.

Fat men are terribly angry at this. Internally, they understand that doctors, friends and relatives, perhaps, are really right and they, fatty fatties, should not have gotten so fed up, but, on the other hand, what is their dog business? !! This is my body, the fat man thinks, what I want with him is what I do. I want to be fat – and I will be fat, trample it all with a mammoth.

Besides, these doctors – they are assholes, all as one! Today they say one thing, tomorrow another, the day after tomorrow a third. For several decades, they screamed that in no case should you eat fatty, that you need to monitor cholesterol, that fatty foods increase weight, increase the risk of cardiovascular diseases, and so on and so forth!

And now they say that, according to the latest research, it is not fats that lead to weight gain, but easily digestible carbohydrates and that it is not fatty foods that cause cardiovascular diseases, but the excess weight of the person himself. Forgive us, good people, these doctors and excellent academicians say, we were wrong. You can eat fatty stuff, we allow it. But do not eat carbohydrates, we do not allow.

So maybe tomorrow they will tell you that being fat is actually good? That they were wrong. That not being overweight causes cardiovascular diseases, but, for example, some small gene. A tiny gene, like that scorpion gene that they planted on either wheat or corn, and they definitely planted it on many mother-in-law on the planet.

Vaughn and Exler writes that being fat is good, you have to go and read. Probably the latest scientific research has shown that overweight people have … However, stop, he also has this section called “Weight Loss”, so he will prove that being fat is good, and then he will tell you how to lose weight? Oh they fool our brother, oh they fool!

Yes, dear friends, they make a fool of your and our brother. Because there are no considerations for being fat. I couldn’t think of anything even for starters, although I thought about this for a long time.

Stage image

However, no, stop! There is one consideration, there is! You can be fat if it matches your stage image. That’s for sure! After all, there are many fat people in life, right? And in cinema and theater, which reflect our lives, someone should play fat men? It’s not the same for the actor to put pillows under his clothes, and it will look unnatural.

Try to imagine thin, for example, Alexander Semchev. Or Mamuka Kikayleshvili, the kingdom of heaven to him. Or John Goodman. Or the House of de Luis. Or Wayne Knight. Stage image, there’s no going anywhere!

Lyrical digression. I remember that in 1999, during a tour along the coast, Ilya Oleinikov and Yuri Stoyanov performed in Sochi-Lazarevsky. We invited them after the concert to have dinner in our restaurant. At dinner, Oleinikov refused fried potatoes and leaned on green salads. Ilyusha is losing weight, losing weight, Stoyanov explained to us, who just leaned on potatoes, and fried chicken, and everything else.

“And I can’t lose weight,” Stoyanov said and explained why. It turns out that he wears special cut trousers for the performance – they have a belt in the navel area. If the belly sticks out noticeably, then the trousers on such a belly look funny, the viewer, as Stoyanov said, laughs. It is worth losing weight, the belly disappears, the figure with such trousers does not look funny, but ridiculous, the viewer does not laugh. And we, Stoyanov said, dipping a few slices of fried potatoes in a bowl of mayonnaise, we do everything for the viewer.

So if for you completeness is part of the stage image, then everyone is free, close this section and never come here again: you can, you sacrifice yourself in the name of art, deep respect for you in particular and art in general.

And now let’s continue for those for whom completeness is not part of the stage image.

About yourself beloved

The brain is constructed in such a way that it diligently protects a person from psychological stress. This, on the one hand, is good, but, on the other hand, it leads to the fact that we completely do not notice how we launch ourselves. If they suddenly showed me a hundred and fifteen kilograms (phew, barely pronounced), I would have been shocked, turned gray with grief and, God forbid, had a heart attack.

But I got to this record weight in just a couple of years.

Look – seventy kilograms, size 44.

And in less than two years – about one hundred and ten, 52nd size.

Of course, we notice and celebrate the changes that are happening to us. But since this happens rather slowly, we have time to get used to these changes and they – up to a certain point, of course – somehow do not bother us.

We even flaunt it: I really called myself “a fat and handsome guy”, although only the first half of the phrase was correct there.

Useless

Nobody has the right to tell a fat man that he is a fat man. It is rude, unethical, intolerant and generally offensive. And I still think so: in my life I won’t tell a fat man (especially a fat woman) to his face that he is a fat man. What, ask, reasons? By the way, it is far from being rude, unethical, intolerant, and generally offensive. From completely different considerations, namely because it is devil-to-go! Completely useless! The reaction to such a statement, I remember very well, is a sharp rejection: “And what a dog business is yours”, “I do what I want with myself”, “Wouldn’t you go, you know where”, ” “, and so on.

And the fat man, in general, is absolutely right. This is not your dog’s business. This is his own business. And it is useless for him to say something until the moment when it comes to himself. And it can come slowly, and maybe quickly. This can happen under the influence of some circumstances, or it can come without special external circumstances, if the head itself works well. After all, a fat man (fat woman) understands perfectly well that being fat is bad. He may be fat, but by no means a fool.

Purely physiologically, excess weight for a person is a completely unnatural state. And even at a time when a tribe of ancient people filled up a mammoth and gorged itself to the dump in reserve, everyone was well aware that this “reserve” would be enough for a maximum of one day. And no matter how much you eat this meat, in a day you will be specifically hungry.

And in hunger, as many said, the fat men died just the first, and not the last. They used to eat a lot, and when they were drastically deprived of food, it was wild stress for the body.

You may not admit to strangers, but you will have to admit to yourself that carrying extra weight on yourself is really hard. How much excess weight did you gain there? Thirty-two kilos? Lift two pounds of weights, walk with them all day. Of course, this is not a very correct analogy: firstly, you will add two more poods to your extra two poods, and secondly, the body gets used to excess weight gradually, so the adaptation process is relatively painless.

But in fact, you have to carry two poods on yourself. And, what is unpleasant, absolutely useless two pounds. Moreover, two poods are specifically harmful. And all this must be fed, watered, maintained. Two homeless people, two homeless people have settled in your house, they smell bad, look bad, don’t do a damn thing, pollute your apartment, and you still have to feed and water them and take them to the toilet.

What is the difference from your extra two pounds? None. Useless fat, disfiguring your figure, and you need to feed it all, and still carry on yourself all the time.

The heart works with a constant extra load, other organs work with a constant extra load, but what happens from an excessive load? That’s right, breakage. Sometimes such, after which the mechanism cannot be restored. So is the organism.

The pressure is constantly high and does not go well, without shortness of breath you cannot walk even a hundred meters, and even climbing two flights of stairs is an impossible task at all. And what do you like to live like this?

This cannot happen to me

It is always natural for a person to reassure himself with a very stupid phrase: “Well, this cannot happen to me.” With everyone – maybe, but with him – he cannot. And when experts say that being overweight is a serious factor contributing to diabetes, almost all fat people think that this does not apply to them. In Russia, according to some sources, about ten million (!) People suffer from diabetes, but I certainly won’t get into these statistics, Zhirnyuk thinks.

At one time I thought, I certainly won’t get into this statistics. Because what about me? I am not so overweight either. Only thirty extra pounds – two pounds, two bright stories. What is diabetes-schmiabetic? Diabetes was invented by panties, I said proudly, eating my adored charlotte and washing it with rivers of divinely sweet and effervescent drink called Coca-Cola.

Lose weight? Why lose weight? Panties invented to lose weight, I said. Besides, there is a God in heaven. He will think of something. Not that I strongly believed in him, but they say he helps not only those who believe in him, but others too. I’ll lose weight by myself, I thought. Someday it will happen.

Oddly enough, it really happened as if by magic. They showed me a real miracle: in a few months I lost twenty-five kilograms, while not changing anything in my lifestyle and in my diet. And he also boasted about this to his relatives, who for some reason were not happy, but said that there was nothing good about it, this is clearly a consequence of some kind of disease. Well, they did not believe in a divine miracle.

Just think, I said lightly, it must be some kind of garbage like gastritis or hay fever. Let’s cure, I believe in our medicine.

When – to some extent by accident – they checked in, they found out that I happily joined ten million people because I had developed diabetes. The most real, real. With which, as it turned out, I have already passed about a year. And fast weight loss is just one of the complications of diabetes, when, due to metabolic disorders, muscles and adipose tissue begin to become a source of energy and are actively burned by the body. Here’s a wonderful miracle for you, grandmother. And, by the way, diabetes, as the unforgettable Faina Georgievna said, is not sugar!

So why wait for diabetes in order to lose weight as a result of the fact that something went wrong in the body and he began to eat himself? Moreover, the appearance of diabetes will not necessarily be accompanied by weight loss, and maybe quite the opposite. And acquired diabetes in any case will then remain with you forever, because it is not treated, but only compensated, and efforts for this compensation will have to be spent an order of magnitude more than just losing weight without any diabetes.

Fat-fat man all the time is accompanied by a variety of inconveniences, about which people with normal weight have no idea. In addition to shortness of breath and the inability to move normally, there is also sweating, drowsiness, rapid fatigue (of course, you get tired when you carry two extra pounds on yourself, and who does not get tired here?) the opportunity to see his intimate places, except in the mirror, and with specific obesity, he cannot see them even in the mirror, so he has to wait for intimate places, having taken a selfie, to send him a photo by e-mail.

Personal choice

And one more important point. No matter how the fat fat man swaggers, no matter how he calls himself a glorious bun or a wonderful donkey, deep down he hates his current state. He understands perfectly well that somewhere inside this – let’s be honest – a rather unpleasant-looking shell is a smart, thin, ironic and beautiful person, but he is hidden under these flabby bodies.

Do you know why relatives, friends, and even acquaintances still ask the question: “Why are you so fat?” Because, unlike any unpleasant and dangerous chronic diseases, the fact that a person is fat is only his own fault. This is his personal choice.

Nobody will ask a question from the series: “Why is it that you have such a strong allergy to nuts?” Because if a person has a severe allergy to nuts, getting this disease was not his conscious choice, and he almost cannot control the cure for this disease.

But becoming fat and staying in this state is exclusively a factor of the free will of this particular person. Because nobody forces you to become fat, nobody forces you to stay fat. If you stay that way, this is your conscious choice.

This is something like a minor mental disorder: a person is well aware of all the serious disadvantages of his condition, but does not want to do anything about it. Although it certainly can. This is not done once or twice, it requires some effort and some self-discipline, but this is not a Newton binomial and not cutting with a jigsaw on metal.

Talking about “I have a disease that prevents me from losing weight” – they are exclusively for idiots. If you have thyroid disease, as it was said in one movie, then stop eating thyroids. There is a vanishingly small number of diseases that will not allow a fat person to lose weight if they change their lifestyle and diet accordingly. So all this, as it was its own choice, remains the same. Even with significant metabolic disorders, such as diabetes, you can always get in shape. Yes, it will be more difficult to do, but it is nevertheless quite possible.

However, we will not blame the fat men for everything, otherwise we have completely kicked them. In fact, most of them simply do not have the necessary information about how they can wake themselves up quickly enough and relatively comfortable. We will talk about this in the next issues.